Friday, March 6, 2009

cali

everyone everyone EVERYONE we know is in las vegas right now because it's the WCC basketball tournament. but we had to go to cali (JJ hates when i call it cali..."it's southern california") because he had an appointment with the pancreas doctor. all is well, he just can't drink alcohol still or eat fatty red meat (FINE WITH ME!!!) AND we had to wake up at 4 am to catch the plane and it was really terrible. but we got here and boy oh boy what fun.

in the airport i have a coffee and just when the lady on the intercom says, "bording all rows," i feel a growler. so i go to the bathroom while JJ is shaking his head at me. i said, "WHAT?! i can't control my plumbing." he is just OCD about being on time. i am not.

last night we went to the king's hockey game. his dad has season tickets and it's something we have to do everytime we go to JJ's house. the king's name is never optional. so naturally his mother and i drink wine before the game so we are pleasantly tipsy. while i was finishing my last glass at the restaurant, JJ suddenly grabs my arm and says, "we.have.to.go.NOW.i have to poop and there's barf and pee on the toilets in this bathroom." "but i'm not yet finished with my wine!!!" i say. "i do not care. chug it and we gotta go." so i did. i chugged it. then he pulled my hand and we sprinted out of that door faster than a jaguar that belongs to a man with a mid-life crisis.

when we get to staples center (the ice arena) he bolts to the bathroom and i stand outside and wait (for like 4 hours). i'm just giggly because of the wine and i put my hands on my hips and lean backward and forward, stretching a little, looking this way and looking that way, just being leisurely and oblivious. and i look over at this older gentleman standing near the restrooms and he's laughing, trying to cover his mouth with his hand, and i'm like, hmm something must be funny so i look around. then. i. feel. a breeze. and i look down. my sweater buttons popped open and my boobs fell out. i look from my boobs to the man and back to my boobs. then i swiftly zip up my jacket and all i can do is laugh. i laugh and i laugh and i laugh. i sit on the floor for a moment and laugh some more. then when JJ gets out i tell him and he just shakes his head and grabs my hand and takes me to the souvenir shop to buy me a t-shirt. go kings.

then this afternoon we met our friend Tom in santa barbara for lunch and we are just strolling down the street and a scraggly looking man dressed in all black walks up to us and says quite frankly, "do you have fifty cents to spare? i need a shotgun and some PCP."

cali is great.

3 comments:

  1. hahahahaha i love this. but what i don't understand is why weren't you wearing a shirt underneath your sweater?? you're fabulous. i hope CALI was fun.

    ReplyDelete
  2. WOW! I think you should write a blog entirely about your incidents of indecent exposure. It could be quite lengthy. ahahahahaha.

    ReplyDelete

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