all of a sudden JJ screams, "YOUR DOG SHIT ON THE BED" (it's always "your dog" when she's done something naughty.) i said, "she has never shit on the bed ever in life. it cannot be shit." JJ says, "oh no, it is definitely shit."
upon closer inspection, i see chocolate coating on the corners of JJ's mouth. "JJ did you have an oreo weight watchers ice cream bar?" (they are seriously so good we buy the big pack from costco) JJ says, "yes why?"
i go to the incriminating "poop stain" and give it one sniff before i declare, "that is oreo weight watcher ice cream bar on the bed, not shit. you dumbass."
"oh." he says.