Thursday, August 19, 2010

rancho cucamongross

i should have known when we had to make an emergency stop for me to poo that i wasn't going to like my new town. needless to say i was unimpressed with rancho cucamonga. it is a new town, with a god damn Chili's and T.G.I.Fridays on every corner. everything is brand new, there isn't much character. i was also on my period when we got there so i cried every time i saw a Ralph's grocery store (which was about 38 times). all the houses look the same. like if i had a nice glass of wine at a friend's house (this is a fake friend, as i don't yet have any in CA), i would crawl back to my neighborhood and literally not know which house was ours. because that's how similar they are. and then my (fake) neighbors wouldn't like me because i would be The Girl Who Drinks & Forgets Where She Lives. and no one wants to be That Girl. anyway, we have decided to rent for now, until we can figure out if we want to buy a house or not.

but enough about the cons! let's get to the goods:

1. Victoria Gardens. which is a ginormous shopping center (where a gypsy shoved a baby wearing rags into my face for pity money. i can spot a gypsy immediately. in Italy i learned how easy it was to spot a gypsy because they all have dark hair and blue eyes. i also learned in Italy that gypsies aren't to be trusted. Moon had to give me an entire lecture on gypsies before we went to Notre Dame, and still i stopped when a gypsy woman bent over and said in perfect English, "is this yours?" while holding out a gold ring. before i had time to say "no, that's not mine, thanks for asking," Moon grabbed my elbow and rushed me along. "gypsy," she said. "that's how they steal from you. they get you interested in the gold ring that isn't yours and then they pickpocket the shit out of you." anyway, so when this gypsy approached me at Victoria Gardens, i just held my purse closer to my body and refused to make eye contact. but it's sad really, that she was using a baby. but seriously...why are there gypsies in Rancho Cucamonga?????????) ANYWAY, there are wonderful stores in Victoria Gardens and shopping always makes me happy, so i enjoyed myself while there.

2. the baseball field where JJ is going to work. i felt comfortable there. i had such a great sense of community and closeness. i saw lots of families and old people (who doesn't love old people???), and it seemed like a place i will enjoy being. now to find a friend half as fun as Rah at Chiefs hockey games to attend these baseball games with me...

3. lots of Targets.

4. Cleo will love all the parks.

5. i will have JJ. and although i was disappointed in what the town had to offer, i know that this will be a fun adventure for me and ol JJ.


  1. 1. i love calling people gypsies, even when they are not gypsies.

    2. i have family in rancho cucamongo! and also, my brother in law scotty is on a mission for our church there!! so if you see someone who looks like a really tall, tan version of the man in all my pictures...that is the brother of my husband.

  2. Sounds like suburbia. But don't worry, I will still visit you!

  3. you already moved!?! or is this just the... we are visiting to scope out the living scene?


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