Saturday, August 7, 2010

supermotherfudgingglue

i had a darling necklace that broke. and so i superglued it back together. and to make it stick extra well, i held the necklace between my teeth and pressed down. i held it there for 10 seconds and set it down. then all of a sudden it felt like i had fire in my mouth. my whole mouth burned and even my throat was itchy. i FREAKED OUT and called my mom and was like "OHMYGOD MOM! i just ingested superglue from the dollar store and on the back of the tube is says DO NOT PUT IN MOUTH and that is exactly what i did! OHMYGOD I'M GOING TO DIE!!!! WHAT DO I DO!??!?!?!?!?!?!" and the heartless woman started laughing at me. she was like "L, don't freak out. you didn't eat the whole tube, a small drop got in your mouth you aren't going to die." and i was like "MOM, IT'S NOT LIKE IT'S A TRUSTWORTHY BRAND LIKE ELMER'S. IT'S FROM THE DOLLAR STORE. IT IS POISONOUS!!!" and she laughed again. and said, "well, if you're so upset, call poison control center." and i was like "I CALLED YOU FOR HELP. i'm not going to call the poison control center, i'm embarrassed of the story of how i got superglue in my mouth." and she said, "well there you go, if you were really going to die, you would just call them. you're being a little dramatic. you're OK!"

touche, mom.

1 comment:

  1. that is such an anita response too. our moms are so alike:)

    ReplyDelete

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