Thursday, September 20, 2012

a thing that is the truth

dress: Jason Wu for Target, heels: Nine West, glasses: UO

this is such a cute work dress (thanks Mimi for buying it for me!) and as i was taking picture in it i said to myself, "self! go get your fake glasses! they would enhance the bookish-ness of this dress." only i don't need to get all dressed up to go to work anymore. Gemcake doesn't judge me for wearing PJs all the time some days. in fact, a thing that is the truth: i'm really kind of over doing outfit pictures. i feel shackled by them. i'm just a girlmom who shops (and finds stupid good deals) at TJ Maxx and gets dressed sometimes, but who mostly just wants to tell stories. but actually i'm not just a girlmom. i'm also a writer, a mayonnaise connoisseur, a wife, a lover of laughs, etc. wait, am i having an identity crisis? maybe. 

and on that note, i will tell you about an unlucky 8 hours in the Hansen Home. it started at midnight when Cleo woke me up to be let outside. where she tried and tried and tried to poo, yet her efforts were fruitless. when she came back inside she had a little bit of a mess on her bum so i washed and dried. then we went back to bed. at 3:45 a.m. Gemma woke up to eat. i fed her and put her back to bed. i gave her a kiss and then i stepped in something wet. SOMETHING WET THAT YOU STEP IN AT 3:45 AM IS NEVER A GOOD THING. i hobbled to turn on the light. and my suspicions were confirmed: i had stepped in dog diarrhea. Cleo had shat on Gemma's rug before we all went to bed. i shouted out in frustration and anger, washed my foot and scrubbed the carpet. which only intensified the smell. so i made JJ wake up and help me take the rug outside to air out. then we went back to bed.

you think that's the end of the bad luck, don't you? you thought that stepping in dog diarrhea in the wee morning hours was a fair end to the unlucky? wrong. JJ slept through his alarm and had to cut his planned long run short. and also he put egg whites in his coffee instead of half n half (actually that shit is just plain hil-ar-ious). then i woke up at 8:21 and realized that Gemma's doctor's appointment was 21 minutes ago, and my alarm had gone off to remind me, only the sound was turned off on my phone. so we missed the appointment entirely. THEN JJ realized he forgot to do his football picks. and i hadn't gotten my coffee yet. he had time for only one. which do you think he chose? 

the wrong one. 


  1. I love your outfit pics!! Don't stop posting them:)

  2. EGG WHITES IN THE COFFEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is the FUNNIEST thing I've ever heard. I'm so giving him crap about that!

  3. Oh my L. What happened to you is why I won't have a god. Not a joke.

    I like your outfit posts too. :)

    Distinctly M

  4. 1. Totally understand not doing the outfit pics anymore. I work at home and let me tell you if I had to put together an outfit & take a pic of myself everyday.. well... I just wouldn't.
    2. TOTALLY understand egg white in the coffee!!! Have done it before, and yes, I will probably do it again. Tell JJ he is not alone.
    3. Sorry you're having a rough day :( You need a cupcake. Or a hug.

  5. rofl...did he notice his coffee had egg whites it it before or after he took a sip? SO FUNNY.

    oh...and i've so been there with doggie diarrhea. no bueno.

  6. I love the outfit posts too (you always give me great ideas of outfits I can put together myself), but I love your writing even more! I look forward to reading everyday and always laugh out loud. Thanks for doing what you do!


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