Monday, September 10, 2012

L the Assclown

dress/heels: Target, belt: TJ Maxx, sunglasses: American Eagle

i have a couple more dress day pics in which my hair is blonde. 

but the truth is, i dyed it brown-ish. i feel like i'm blonde in my heart, and now my head doesn't match so i'm confused. as a result, i have sort of rejected the brown. my hair is definitely softer and healthier, and closer to my natural color (read: less high-maintenance) but i'm just a blonde. but here is what i look like now. i even have a fake smile to go with the new hair. 

Gemma has fallen in love. with CowBaby. we got it from JJ's family friend at our shower in L.A. she snuggles with it and sucks on it and is obsessed with that little lovie. i think we need to buy a back-up in case something happens to the original.

this last weekend we went to Arizona for JJ's sister's baby shower. 

JJ's sister E (with Baby Nora in her belly), and daughter Natalie, JJ's sister C, JJ's Mom, and Me & Gem. (dress: Tucker for Target, sandals: Dolce Vita)

it was a fun girlie weekend, and so special to celebrate little Nora (who is due on Halloween!) and i got to see my friend Sam and her new gorgeous apartment while we drank fancy wine and played with little Gemsie Bear. C the Chef made us delicious dinners both nights and Natalie gave us some fabulously atrocious makeovers.

as E was driving me to the airport yesterday, my idiot self realized i didn't have my wallet. askdjfajlskdflja i mean, how much more of an assclown could i be? i left it in JJ's mom's wallet when we were at the mall the day before. and so E walked me all the way through the airport to security, where TSA called Washington D.C. and interrogated me on my life and patted me down to check for machetes and swabbed my hands for bomb fragments. JJ's sister C texted me and said, "make sure they don't know you have drugs up Gemma's ass." hahajhkdhjkdhahahahahaha. and behind me in the security line was a John Hamm look alike and i almost died of excitement. i thought it was really him for a minute, until i realized that John Hamm probably doesn't have shitty luggage. but i still stared openly and thought about (but didn't execute) goosing him. 

and when it was over, all i wanted was a bottle of wine. and then we sat down on the plane, and G screamed for 25 straight minutes and i got all hot embarrassed sweaty and panicky. then she projectile vommed all over me and it got down my shirt into my cleavage and in my hair. then she took a big poo and i had to change her in the tiny lavatory. we were a god damned smelly mess. but we made it home. and i have never been more thrilled to see JJ and Cleo. and then we went to QFC to get our favorite sandwiches and i scarfed that delicious footlong and went to bed at 9. 

so dramatic.


  1. Oh what are you talking about girl, you look so much better with this hair color! Your eyes just pop, hope you dont go back to blonde:)

  2. Thank you for making the trek this weekend! So fab to see you and cuddle with Gemsie Bear! Nora and I appreciate it! You are not an assclown; you're a mom. Yes, in about 13 years, Gemma will think those things are synonymous, but for now cut yourself some slack. It was no biggie to walk thru security, and seeing the Jon Hamm lookalike was awesome. If it was him, I would have climbed him like a spider monkey!

    PS: you're a natural at the mom wear it well!

  3. love you with brown. youre my fave!!!!!

  4. Honestly i think the brown makes you look much more "hot sexy mom!" Instead of "hot nanny"

  5. I like this dress! Makes me want to hand you a hair of maracas and a shot of Jose Cuervo. Also, I like the brown!!!

  6. Can't believe your airport shenanigans! Thanks for visiting. Love seeing you and Gem!


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