Friday, January 4, 2013

an encounter with my neighbor


jeans: Abercrombie, cardigan/belt: Gap, heels: BCBG
see there? look at the size of my chest with those rufffffffles. all puffy like a male bird showing off.

yesterday i let Cleo out in the backyard to do her Morning Business and went to get Gem down for her nap. about a half hour went by and obviously i forgot about the dog because that's what happens when you have a child. you forget about the dog, who becomes a second-rate citizen in your house.

i poked my head out the back door and said "BAYYY-CONS?!" (just....this is the word JJ trained her to get excited about when he gives her doggie bacon treats. i'll explain this another time. i will also include a recording. because Cleo has her own language dialect we use with her). anyway, all i heard was her incessant barking outside. and so i ran to the fence. BLAST! she had escaped from our yard to the neighbors' and was harassing the god damned chickens again. "sonofabitch Cleo, you suck," is what i muttered under my breath. and then i noticed my man neighbor who appeared out of nowhere and was doing yardwork--who looked up at me in surprise. and so i walked over to him and said "oh, i uh...i'msosorryaboutcleo. she's so naughty." he said it was no problem blah-blah-blah and then we had a 10 minute conversation about neighborly things like how hard it is to dig up overgrown bamboo and gosh! that dog two doors down is a real terror, and wouldn't it be nice if that sun would come out so our compost would do compost-y things? (i don't even have compost. i just pretended like i knew what i was talking about). the boring tête-à-tête came to a close, and so i tipped my imaginary hat, bid him adieu, grabbed Cleo and went back inside. then i walked past the mirror and stopped dead in my tracks. and shouted at my reflection, OH COME ONNNNNNNNNNNNN L! WHAT IN THE NAME OF HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!!?!?!"

because this is what i saw:

those are my breast pads.
you guys. i had a 10-MINUTE CONVERSATION WITH MY MAN NEIGHBOR with my BREAST PADS. HANGING. OUT.


47 comments:

  1. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
    at first i thought it was your bra, but boob pads are even better. my personal boob pad pet peeve is the nippular indention, which often makes me look like i'm very cold when i am, in fact, not.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, obviously your chest looks large because you stuff your bra. Or, at least that's what your male will be telling all of your other neighbors. DYING! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. hahahaha, omg, omg, omg. i'd be mind effing myself over that, long time. guaranteed a new ocd breast pad check is part of the routine now, huh!? LOL sorry L, this one is Funny! ;D Happy weekend chica

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lol omg no wonder he talked to you for so long. Great story.

    eatpaintread.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. bahbahbhabhahbha!! I have to say, I started following your blog after I spotted "The Ruffle Shirt" on pintrest and I have been reading ever since. Just love your stories. This one made me about pee myself...no literally, I am 6 1/2 months preggo so peeing my pants is sometimes a normal things these days. LMAO!!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOSH.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Thank you for the great laugh! It made my day. You find humor in everything and express it so well.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You are absolutely entertaining with your stories!

    ReplyDelete
  9. omfgggggg I die. that is amazing. you probably just made his year!!

    ReplyDelete
  10. LOL! Hilarious. PS what's happening with your laundry room behind you? Looks like an awesome setup and I was actually thinking of ways to organize my own. Do you have a rod hanging above your washer to dry clothes? Genius!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes! i have a rod. i hang my sweatshirts/clothes that need drying from it. my dad jimmy-rigged it up with some wood and chain metal. hahahahaa

      Delete
  11. That even tops when your breast pad plopped onto the dance floor at Char's wedding! (did you forget about that?)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. omg mom. hahahaha I DID FORGET. hahahahaa

      Delete
  12. okay can you PLEASEEEE like make your blog disable itself at midnight or something?!!!!!! ONCE AGAIN I am going to bed at 1am because I have been reading it forever! McKay has been asleep for like 3 hours lol. you are hilar. Oh and I have laughed out loud a bunch of times- disturbing sleeping mckay!

    ReplyDelete
  13. oh no!! that's a little bit of a fashion faux pas! oh well :) I do love the white ruffles!
    floral&fudge

    ReplyDelete
  14. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  15. This is a good tip particularly to those fresh to the
    blogosphere. Brief but very precise information… Thank you for sharing this one.
    A must read article!

    Look into my web page ... see more

    ReplyDelete
  16. We're a bunch of volunteers and starting a brand new scheme in our community. Your site provided us with useful information to work on. You have performed an impressive process and our whole group might be grateful to you.

    Also visit my site - the college

    ReplyDelete
  17. We're a bunch of volunteers and starting a brand new scheme in our community. Your site provided us with useful information to work on. You have performed an impressive process and our whole group might be grateful to you.

    Review my web blog - the college
    Also see my page > the grants

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oh my goodness! Amazing article dude! Thank you so much, However I am going through difficulties with your
    RSS. I don't know the reason why I cannot join it. Is there anybody having similar RSS issues? Anyone who knows the answer can you kindly respond? Thanx!!

    Look into my weblog :: More aili69
    my webpage - http://www.astromindsclub.com/JanffkuMc

    ReplyDelete
  19. Attractive section of content. I just stumbled upon
    your weblog and in accession capital to assert that I acquire
    in fact loved account your blog posts. Any way I'll be subscribing on your augment and even I achievement you get admission to consistently quickly.

    Feel free to surf to my website http://Hardfucked...

    ReplyDelete
  20. Very energetic post, I loved that a lot. Will there be a part 2?


    My weblog ... http://Petitevirg...
    Also see my web site :: http://petitevirgins.net/Index.php?Own=2501510

    ReplyDelete
  21. I am really loving the theme/design of your website.
    Do you ever run into any internet browser compatibility problems?
    A few of my blog audience have complained about my blog not working correctly in Explorer but
    looks great in Firefox. Do you have any recommendations to help fix
    this issue?

    Here is my web site; http://teensfirstdp.org/index.php?own=2097102

    ReplyDelete
  22. Thanks very nice blog!

    My website: more

    ReplyDelete
  23. I do trust all of the ideas you have offered for your
    post. They are really convincing and can definitely work.

    Still, the posts are too quick for newbies. May you please extend them a little from subsequent time?
    Thanks for the post.

    Here is my web-site: in Coed Gangbangs

    ReplyDelete
  24. Just wish to say your article is as amazing. The clarity to your put
    up is just spectacular and i could assume you
    are knowledgeable on this subject. Fine along with your permission allow me to grab your RSS feed to
    keep up to date with coming near near post. Thanks one million and please continue the rewarding work.


    Stop by my blog post: by Sorority Orgy

    ReplyDelete
  25. Nice post. I learn something totally new and challenging on websites I stumbleupon every
    day. It will always be helpful to read content from other authors and use something from their
    websites.

    Have a look at my website: http://onlymachinesex.com/index.php?own=2507111

    ReplyDelete
  26. I am sure this piece of writing has touched all the internet
    visitors, its really really good piece of writing on building up new weblog.


    Feel free to surf to my website :: a Check Out These Hot Ass Petite Euro Babes Get Drilled In Their Hot Asses

    ReplyDelete
  27. Appreciate this post. Let me try it out.

    my homepage: into Sasha Yung The Almost Virgin

    ReplyDelete
  28. Thank you for the auspicious writeup. It in fact
    was a amusement account it. Look advanced to far added agreeable from you!

    However, how could we communicate?

    Also visit my web site; http://pornharvest.com/index.php?m=2505166

    ReplyDelete
  29. I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did
    you design this website yourself or did you
    hire someone to do it for you? Plz respond as I'm looking to design my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from. kudos

    My page ... http://petiteteenworld.com/index.php?own=2511837

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hi, this weekend is nice for me, as this moment i am reading this impressive educational article here at my residence.


    My web blog; http://sororityorgy.org

    ReplyDelete
  31. I really like your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you make this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for
    you? Plz reply as I'm looking to construct my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from. thanks

    My blog post ... 1

    ReplyDelete
  32. My developer is trying to persuade me to move to .

    net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the
    costs. But he's tryiong none the less. I've been using WordPress on
    numerous websites for about a year and am anxious about switching to another platform.
    I have heard fantastic things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can transfer all my wordpress content into it?
    Any kind of help would be really appreciated!

    My webpage; Homepage

    ReplyDelete
  33. Asking questions are actually good thing if you are not
    understanding anything completely, however this post offers pleasant understanding
    even.

    Take a look at my webpage - at photo

    ReplyDelete
  34. It is perfect time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy.
    I have read this post and if I could I want to suggest you few interesting things or advice.
    Maybe you can write next articles referring to this article.
    I desire to read more things about it!

    my weblog: Doris - Timbo-World.com

    ReplyDelete
  35. You've made some really good points there. I checked on the internet for more info about the issue and found most people will go along with your views on this website.

    my site; total stranger

    ReplyDelete
  36. If you want to grow your knowledge simply keep visiting this web page and be updated with the
    most up-to-date news update posted here.

    my web site ... my sources

    ReplyDelete
  37. Normally I don't read post on blogs, however I would like to say that this write-up very compelled me to check out and do so! Your writing taste has been amazed me. Thanks, very nice post.

    Stop by my web page :: http://pornharvest.com/index.php?q=Porn+Video+Huge&f=a&p=a

    ReplyDelete
  38. Superb, what a weblog it is! This webpage gives
    useful data to us, keep it up.

    Feel free to visit my homepage: this hyperlink

    ReplyDelete
  39. Hey there! Quick question that's totally off topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly? My web site looks weird when viewing from my iphone4. I'm trying to find a template or plugin that
    might be able to fix this problem. If you have any recommendations, please share.
    Thank you!

    Look at my site http://pornharvest.com/index.php?m=2490813

    ReplyDelete
  40. I like the valuable information you provide in your articles.
    I will bookmark your weblog and check again here
    regularly. I'm quite sure I will learn many new stuff right here! Best of luck for the next!

    my blog post :: a replacement

    ReplyDelete
  41. I think what you published made a ton of sense.
    But, think about this, suppose you typed a catchier post title?

    I am not suggesting your content isn't good., but what if you added something that grabbed folk's attention?
    I mean "an encounter with my neighbor" is kinda boring. You could glance at Yahoo's front page and see how they create news headlines to grab viewers to click. You might add a video or a related pic or two to grab people excited about what you've got to say.
    In my opinion, it might bring your posts a little livelier.


    my weblog; young adorable brunette

    ReplyDelete
  42. Hello, always i used to check webpage posts here in the early hours in the
    morning, as i enjoy to learn more and more.

    Here is my web page - http://Pornharvest.com/index.php?q=nubiles+andrea_kelly&f=a&p=s

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...