Monday, March 25, 2013

Easter goodies

Easter is a lovely holiday in which we celebrate the resurrection of Christ (HE IS RISEN! HE IS RISEN INDEED! you can't just say those words. they beg to be shouted), but it's also a holiday that allows a giant bunny to break into your house to fill a basket with little presents and candy for your children, and hide hard-boiled eggs in your backyard (???) seriously though, when you think about it...W.T.F. 

in any case, i was really excited to fill Gemmie's first Easter basket this year! here's a breakdown of the goods:

1. rainbow stacker. my friend Mel got one for her baby and i fell in love. but when she said she found it at HomeGoods my heart sank. because HomeGoods neverrrr has the same things twice. but alas, i found one at TJ Maxx. it's so cute, and perfectly age appropriate for Gemcake.

2. Sugar Booger Owl Sippy Cup. this adorable little cup and the even more adorable company name--omg i just couldn't resist.

3. dancing giraffe toy. i bought this at a little shop in Olympia, but this one's similar. Gem actually picked this out herself and has been playing with it since we bought it, but i'm stealing it back to put in her basket. is that mean?

4. pink ruffle swimsuit. i got this at the babygap outlet, but this one's similar. my sisters and i always got swimsuits for Easter growing up, so i wanted to carry on that fun family tradition for Gemma.

5. tiny chick. i don't even know why i am so obsessed with these. but i am. desperately obsessed. they are so miniature and sweet and i kind of wish i had a real chick. but then i remember that it turns into a chicken. so, no. 

6. The Happy Egg. G is very particular with books. she has favorites and she knows them. if i try to sneak in a book she doesn't like, she cries and swats it away. little turd. i'm hoping she'll like this sweet and simple story. 

7. Push Around Dog. i love this little wooden dogggggg! and Gemma likes toys with wheels. so it's a win-win.


Friday, March 22, 2013

what's inside my brain

1. you know, this picture could have been really great if i actually shaved my armpits on a regular basis. there are areas in personal grooming that we are all sticklers about, ya know? shaving isn't one of them. at least not for me (though, after blowing up this picture, it definitely should be). i'm more concerned about my fingernails being painted at all times. literally. all. time. i feel naked without paint on my nails.

2. if you have not tried the cool ranch dorito taco from the bell........YOUARESERIOUSLYMISSINGOUT. because that shit is so delicious. i met up with my friend Big G (which we decided is an unfortunate but necessary nickname, so as not to be confused with Little G) in the Forever21 parking lot where we scarfed down the tacos and then went into F21 to do a little shopping. of course Gemma found a duck bath mitt that she couldn't live without and Big G so graciously spoiled Little G by purchasing said duck bath mitt.

3. the Gonzaga game was so stressful. JJ blamed me for the almost-loss because i "all of a sudden cared when they were doing just fine without my support."

4. we had a playyyyyyyydate with Mel and Little M and they were so cute playing together. Gem is seriously going through the "Stranger Danger" phase where she trusts no one. but she allowed her little bff and mom to hang out with us all morning:

xbox remotes for the win.

 Gemstar had a mouthful of paint chips after this. nice.

4. it snowed. it snowed at my house this morning. just please.

5. did you know that i am the accountant in my family? well i am. even though i am terrible at math. JJ is the moneymoney maker and i'm the spender and the treasurer. i filed our taxes yesterday. isn't it sort of stressful? like AM I DOING THIS RIGHT?! but i did do it right, and i'm quite proud of my work. 

6. what is the proper tomato to onion ratio when making pico de gallo? because judging by JJ's breath last night, it definitely was heavy on the onion. 

7. has anyone ever used one of these things when traveling with a carseat? does it work? i need a solution. i can't carry the damn thing all the way through the airport to gate check all by myself.

8. Jim Carrey and his big feet on David Letterman. omg. i peed my pants.

9. i have never wished more that i lived in the Harry Potter books than i do at this time in my life. i have always wanted to be able to do the obvious things like apparate and save Cedric Diggory and bow to a Hippogriff, but lately i would settle with just a magic wand to pick up Gemma's toys before i stub my toes on all of them.

10. omg so true:

Thursday, March 21, 2013

i have turned a new sports leaf

JJ and i had a wild debate this morning over what kind of pizza we should get for lunch during the Gonzaga game. 

obviously i won.

costco pizza > all other pizza

ZAG UP FOOLS!!!!!! i've never been so excited about sports in my lifetime. and it's kind of fun. i dug up JJ's old jersey (#5 - holler Raivio!) and dressed Gemmaroonie in her GU sweatsuit and JJ is wearing a Gonzaga tshirt and a hat. we rolled into costco like a goddamn fan club for the bulldogs, and people shouted "WOOHOO! GO ZAGS!" in our faces when we walked by and it was thrilling. we even got a high five from one of the cashiers. IT FEELS GOOD TO BE A ZAGGGGGGGGG TODAY. i mean, c'mon. even the new pope loves himself some zag basketball:


Wednesday, March 20, 2013

and on that note

jeans: J Brand, sweater: Banana Republic, tee: Frenchi, necklace: Chewbeads, parka: Gap, boots: Target

just please L. stop with that face. but at least there was a break in raining for my outfit picture this morning.

and on that note, first day of spring my aunt fanny. this is what i'm wearing today for the 80% chance of rain that's forecasted. dudes, that parka was $20. what a find. i'm really obsessed with it. and a parka is still needed in the PNW, so it was a win-win. 

and on that note, i am shopping for a swimsuit. and the one i want is backordered. and it's so annoying. do i take the risk and hope that it gets here before my trip to Hawaii?

and on that note, our box of lead painted wooden monkeys direct from China landed on our doorstep yesterday. which was perfect timing because G lost the original one in California. 

and on that note, Gemma was a perfect angel on the flight home from California. best flight with her to date. JJ and i were separated and i was stuck in a middle seat with the baby while JJ sipped ginger ale and read his book and took a small snooze. to the Sesame Street podcasts and the arrowroot cookies, i owe you my life. 

and on that note, arrowroot cookies are gross. and so is the constant awkward bulge in my t-shirt from the nursing tank tops i wear everyday.

and on that note, did you know that i have a rotation of 5 nursing tank tops? i wear them everyday all day (and all night), under everything. bras be damned.

and on that note, i have a bag of butterfinger eggs that is calling my name. bye.  

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

what's on L's phone?!

gemma dear. 

my friend Mel and i took our cranky teething babies to UVillage for some screaming. it was a good time. each little girl got a toy to soothe their achy gums. pooooooor girlies. and then Gemma learned how to drink out of a straw at Jamba Juice! just like that. it was so exciting! and so we got her a sippy cup with a straw to use at home. we filled it with water and she threw it on the ground. when there's no sugary goodness at the end of the straw, there's obviously no point in drinking out of it.   

Ann Taylor Loft dressing rooms are the best dressing rooms for nursing. clean and pretty and soft seating. hell to the yes.  

taking a bath in the sink at Grandma's! (isn't that such a rite of passage??) G loves that big ass duck. 

OK SO YOU KNOW THAT RIDE SOARIN' OVER CALIFORNIA IN DISNEYLAND? well JJ's parent's live right by the part where you smell the orange trees. i just love that factoid. like i reallllllly love it. i tell everyone. i brag until the day is done about it. and everyone is like "i knowwwww L. i know. you've told me that like a hundred times." anyway, we went strolling through all the orange and lemon trees and it was really fun. until JJ stole an orange and i got really worried that we were going to get caught and thrown in jail forever (i'm such a rule-following oldest child).

one of Gemsie Bear's favorite books is Where Is the Green Sheep? we took her to a little farm on Sunday and she got really excited to see a real sheep in real life. and you guys, sheep shit smells.  

THAT'S TINY JJ with his older brother. oh. em. gee. isn't he so adorably kissable? those sandals. and his little jumper.  

on our way from JJ's parents' house to the airport, Gem fell asleep in the car and her head kept bobbing. so i held her face up for her and died at how cute it made her cheeks look.  

JJ's dad is obsessed with the L.A. Kings. he has season tickets and everything. and we always see him on TV because he's the only one in the crowd who wears the old yellow jersey from the 80s. JJ finally paused the TV and we took a picture. WHERE'S WALDO? (but seriously. when you're playing where's waldo and you finally find his ass, isn't like "omg. it's so obvious. WHY DIDN'T I FIND HIM SOONER?!") 

MONSTER BUTT! my extremely talented sister-in-law Em MADE these pants for G. she knit them. with her own two hands. AREN'T THEY ADORABLE?! and i'm so obsessed with them. they are sooooo cute. AND just for good measure she whipped up a coupla hats.  

this is what i dealt with today. coming home from vacation is the worst.  

haaaaaaaahahahahahahhahahahhahahaa this is seriously my favorite thing. in. the. world. OHMYGOD. my sister M and i were literally dying laughing over this. we were crying we laughed so hard. TOP RIGHT. is my favorite. hahahahhaahaaaaaaaahahhahah

me, my sister CA and my grandma on the way to brunch! 

i had Lasik surgery in college. it really is a miracle surgery. i woke up the day after and was all "I CAN SEE! I CAN SEE! GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!" totally fabulous. and then i had a baby. and now i can't see again. piss! and so i went to see my uncle the eye doctor and he said that until i'm done having babies, it probably isn't worth it to get Lasik done. and i was like OK MY UNCLE IS ASKING ME ABOUT MY FAMILY PLANNING AND I DON'T REALLY EVEN KNOW WHAT MY FAMILY PLAN IS. so i got glasses. my cousin (pictured) picked out these frames for me. i kind of love them. 

my friend got Gemstone this sweet shirt. and aren't big, obnoxious red bows the best kind of bows? 

sour lemon face!  

Lola hogging Gem's blanket. typical.  

Gemma is beginning to crawl. actually, scratch that. it's not a crawl really. it's more of a one-legged pirate hobble and it's so hilarious. but she only does it if there's something out of her reach that she realllllly wants. like cheese. and so naturally i created a cheese trail to get her to one-legged pirate hobble her way down the hall. this is strikingly similar to how i trained Cleo to learn the command "leave it." HEY! whatever works, ya know?

i went grocery shopping. 

Thursday, March 14, 2013

what's inside my brain

1. this little hipster baby (pictured above)

2. JJ went to Vegas last weekend and left us gals to fend for ourselves. so obviously we went to my parents' house and spent our time eating far too many Easter Cakes. JJ won some ca$h betting on a few sports teams and i'm trying to explain that it's only fair that since he got to go on a boys trip, i should get to buy a new swimsuit with his winnings, amiright?

3. Pope Watch 2013 was fabulous, no? i had a gaggle of friends texting me about the surprising thrill of anticipation they felt while watching. like a real reality TV show! also, he is a Jesuit. go zags. (speaking of, JJ hung up a giant Gonzaga flag from our house--right over Gemma's bedroom window to be exact. every time it blows in the wind i momentarily panic, thinking it's a strange man trying to steal my baby.

4. GEMMIE SAID HER FIRST WORD! quack. which sometimes sounds like "cock" but that's neither here nor there. it's soooo cute! we say "GEMMA! what does a duckie say?" and she replies "quack quack quack" and smiles and giggles and is so pleased with herself.

5. G refuses to eat fruit. but yesterday i watched her put a rock in her mouth.

6. this. book. you guys go read it RIGHT NOW. it is absolutely beautiful. such a heart-wrenching story about humanity. it's one of those rare finds that are impossible to put down--and you never want it to end.

7. how often do you wash your sheets? for reals. i read somewhere that Oprah has hers changed every third day. WHAAAA?! so seriously. what's a reasonable timeline for cleaning the linens?

8. i really am in love with my chewbeads necklace. it's a toy for Gemcake and her growing teeth as well as an adorable statement piece.

9. my Mimi called me last week and said, "do you know what i want for my birthday? you and Gemma." and so she granted her own wish! she bought us plane tickets. which means me and my fave little baby girlfriend are headed to HAWAII NEXT MONTH! (Mimi and Papa live in Hawaii for half of the year) we are so excited! we danced around and jumped and got real excited. then i remembered that the plane ride is 6 hours. and YOU GUYS I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO FOR SIX HOURS ON A PLANE WITH GEMMONSTER.

10. this photo of me and Gemmaroonie:

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

what's on L's phone?!

SPOTTED: two cool dudes. 

ZAGSFORLIFE! i hate sports, but i suppose it IS pretty cool that mine and JJ's alma mater is #1 in the country for basketball right now. prettttttty cool. so i had to dig up this fantasically old pic of Rah and me, drunk in our underwear from 2005. note: the arm up pose was my signature pose. also, wtf is up with my hair? it's worse than the post-baby regrowth that's currently going on right now. 

 i wanted a flower crown. but the one i wanted was grossly overpriced (get out of here Urban Outfitters!!!) and so i bought some Martha Stewart fake flowers and hot glued them to a headband! (total: $3). i'm so crafty! i sent this picture to my mom and she was all "WHAT?! YOU ALWAYS MADE FUN OF MY WEDDING PICTURES BECAUSE MY BRIDESMAIDS WERE WEARING FLOWER CROWNS! NOW THEY'RE BACK IN STYLE?!" sorry mom, i don't establish the trends. but seriously though, i am going to wear this flower crown every day that the sun is out in Seattle. 

GEMMAAAAAA is so cool in her shades. she is absolutely pleased as punch when she's wearing them. girl knows they're fabulous.  

morning beach walk with this little turd! 


Grandma took this photo of us girls. Gemcat is like a celebrity stonefacing the paparazzi.  

this is how she sleeps. shoved all the way at the top of her crib, feet propped up on the seahorse, blanket giving me a heart attack looming so close to her airways (Grandma has since banned the blanket in her crib) and Fleur the Bunny by her side.   

at G's 9-month appointment, the doctor gave us Mr. Yuk stickers. i nearly died with nostalgia. i was all "OMG YOU GUYSSSSS REMEMBER MR. YUK?!?!?! IT'S MR. YUK!" my husband and mother-in-law were like "ummmmm. no. who is Mr. Yuk?" wtf? they didn't have Mr. Yuk in California?! Mr. Yuk taught me that Comet was poison. Mr. Yuk is a very powerful man! every child should know Mr. Yuk. 

Friday, March 1, 2013

what's inside my brain

oh you know, just three pals hanging out in front of the washing machine 

1. GEMMA'S FIRST EASTER. ASDHFJKASAHHHH! i just cannot even breathe. she has a bonnet you guys. A. BONNET.

2. Marchesa for JCP. just a whole bunch of fabulousness that i want to live in.

3. J Brand sent me an email entitled WE MISS YOU. believe you me, J Brand, i fuckin miss you too.

4. re: yesterday: allllllright Today show. we get it. the pope is retiring. stop covering itttttt. #worstcatholicever

5. my mother-in-law is coming to town on sunday! that means shopping, Gemma/Grandma time, delicious food and lots of love. my own mother said to me, "L, please promise me that you'll wipe the baseboards clean in your bathroom before Anne gets there." but but but...okfine mom, i will.

6. my friend Mel's family is from Hawaii. and so her nice self gave JJ and me two boxes of chocolate covered macadamia nuts. and I MEAN. they were gone in a flash. IN A FLASH.

7. speaking of chocolate, i bought one bag of butterfinger eggs and one bag of reese's eggs and one more bag of reese's mini peanut butter cups (for good measure, you know) and dumped them into a serving dish with a lid (that was a piece of JJ's grandparents' wedding china!) i thought it was a great idea to hide the treats in there, like "oh you know, out of sight, out of mind." wrong. WRONG. dead wrong. now i'm just painfully aware of how much chocolate i am eating because i walk over to that damn serving dish every 30 seconds for another.

8. the Taylor Swift Goat Song. hahahahah LJ showed it to me the other day and i'm sorry Taylor, you're my girl, but OMGGG IT'S SOOOO FUNNY. and now i can't listen to the original song without laughing.

9. Gemma got JJ a pair of running underwear for Valentine's Day. and he loves them. whenever they're clean, they're the first ones he wears. the other night before bed i said to JJ, "JJ YOU ARE SO CUTE I JUST LOVE YA!" and he smiled and said he loved me too. then we climbed in bed and i read my book and he watched the Kings and we were settling into the quietness of night, when all of a sudden he turned to me and said, "L. i know why you said i was cute tonight. it's because i put on my performance underwear before bed." ajdfjajshkfdahahahaahahahahaaaaaaa shut up JJ! JUST SHUT UPPPPP hahahahhahaaaa i died laughing. partly because he had spent so much time thinking about it, but mostly because he called them "performance underwear" like an old mannnnn.

10. SPOILER ALERT!!! i just watched the newest episode of PLL on my DVR and OMFG TOBY'S DEAD?! thanks for ruining my friday, abc family. thanks a lot.

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